Saturday, May 1, 2010

Ten highly questionable ads starring musicians

What's worse than a musician selling out?

How about a musician selling out without any consideration for his or her image, brand, consistency, dignity, self-respect, or good name?

There are lots of examples of terrible ads featuring musicians out there, but there aren't lots starring Lou Reed, Bob Dylan, and the Beatles. Of course, the Beatles didn't have a say in their Nike ad, so we can't blame them. Capitol Records, however? Guilty!

And I'd love to know the backstory about how Bob Dylan, the voice of a generation, showed up one day to hang out in the panties section of Victoria's Secret to sing "Love Sick." If there's a God, we'll find out in Chronicles, Volume II.

The worst offenders, according to me:

1. Debbie Harry for jeans

Jeans of glass, anyone? Anyone?

2. Lou Reed for scooters

Take a scoot on the not-so-wild side.

3. Bob Dylan for panties

The thong remains the thame.

4. Michael Jackson for sody pop

The King of Pop sure loves kids. Run, kids, run!

5. Ray Charles for raisins

No one guessed that Ray would later devour the raisins whole.

6. KISS for sody pop

So, Cherry Dr. Pepper tastes like...fake blood?

7. Madonna and Missy Elliott for jeans

Tight jeans plus "into the groove", forget it.

8. U2 for computers

Later, Mother Teresa thanked U2 for teaching her how to be so humble.

9. Elton John for credit cards

Just don't mention the shopping addiction...

10. The Beatles for sneakers

All we are saying is give sneaks a chance.

And Paul Simon's rebuttal to the Nike ad:

Interesting comments, coming from the guy now charging $1,000 for two tickets to his MTS Centre concert, eh? Blame Garfunkel!

1 comment:

  1. Musicians have been selling out for years. It's weird how just when a musician becomes popular enough that they can support themselves by playing music, they also become popular enough to sell panties... Although, if anyone is qualified to sing about panties, Bob Dylan certainly comes to mind.

    There's a new Alexander Keiths commercial on the movin' pictures box that features a Stills song. Amazing song, and decent beer. I'd never see that commercial and think that the Stills sold out, cause they barely have a pot to piss in (so to speak). So I say, good on them for making a bit of cash in a gruesome industry.

    And then there's the Feist/iTunes scenario. Most people had never heard of her, and then she explodes because of the commercial (which ran on most major networks in heavy rotation). Without the commercial, she wouldn't be a superstar indie rock darling (per Stephen Colbert). She'd just be an indie rock darling.

    I'd personally love to get into publishing. It's one of the few jobs in music where you can work 9-5, mon-fri, where all you have to do is be creative... hmmm, sounds like advertising to me ;-)

    But I wouldn't sell the songs that I like, I'd just write songs to sell. I guess that's a big difference. As music fans, we feel like it cheapens the emotional connection we have to a song when it's being used to sell panties and beer.

    I'm feeling creative now. I think I'll write a song called "No Trans Fats and half the calories"... I'm sure there's a thousand products that fit that description. ($)($)


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