Sunday, February 14, 2010

Happy first-ever reading week, RRC students

"Helloooo (helloo, helloo, helloo)."

"Anybody there (there, there, there)?"

Either I'm the last-surviving human after a nuclear apocalypse, or it's Red River College's first-ever reading week.

The background about how this reading week came to be is in this Uniter article written by CreComm grad Kristy Rydz; I think she gives our PR research assignment altogether more credit than it deserves, but I'm a sucker for positive feedback. Let's hear it for being needy, people!

So, what do we do on reading week? I thought I'd start by making a list. Here's what I've got so far:
  • Buy marshmallow hearts for half price. Eat them alone.
  • Clip toenails.
  • Bathe.
  • Meet past grads for lunch; give them back unmarked papers.
  • Go to the talkies in a horseless carriage.
  • Fist-fight U of M students at the Alexander Docks.
  • Watch downhill skiing. Continue saying, "That's where my career is going" until it gets a laugh.

"That's where my career is going." Cue tumbleweeds.

  • Tweet.
  • Watch Jersey Shore again to pick up some of the nuances I may have missed the first time.
  • Phone in to the Larry King Show and pretend to be the ghost of Michael Jackson calling from Cleveland.
  • Lobby for my inclusion at "Breakfast with the Interim President."
  • Work on my Freddie Mercury impression.

"Two hundred degrees - that's why they call me Mr. Fahrenheit!"

  • Buy 365 lemon trees to present to people whose feelings I will accidentally hurt over the next 365 days.
  • Shoot all of the pigeons in Grand Theft Auto.

Those damn pigeons! Just make...them...stop cooing!

  • If time permits, read.

Ask not what reading week can do for you; ask what you can do for reading week! To where do I send the lemon trees?


  1. The class of 2003 demands a time machine so I can join my UofM friends who got alcohol poisoning in Florida.

    But I bet CreCom actually has students reading and working over the week!

  2. Am I correct in assuming things have already devolved into a Beyond Thunderdomesque nightmare of fuel rationing and gladatorial combat?


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